A SHATTERED HEART!
It’s on a beautiful evening day while coming from Mosque after performing my evening Adhkar.. I saw a beautiful young girl sitting gorgeously under a bayan tree. I never had the thought of saying Hi. But, I had to - for the fact that I know some set of people sitting under that same tree. Yes, she’s too beautiful.
With her, it wasn’t love at first sight, it was simply love that grew as we interacted often. It started on a friendly note. Cracking jokes till around 7pm. Days went by, and the friendship - from the pretty jokes, the talks, metamorphosed into something beautiful, and amazing. I never could have thought! It took an unexpected turn on me. Yes, I didn’t see myself falling - I didn’t see it coming, but as nature wants it, it will always prevail. I fell yàkàtà.
The matching vibes, the unlying energy says it all. She’s a beautiful soul, with a gorgeous smile. A pleasant voice, and a golden heart. She’s just too good to be forgotten, or neglected.. The memories will forever remain green with me. The late night calls, the fights, the anger, and many more, I’ll say those things make the whole thing more fun, and interesting.
Her pretending act of 'I don't care' when infact she really cares never go unnoticed. Yes, I still wonder how I managed to fall in love with her. I find it unexplainable. Yes, I saw it coming, but I neglected it, hoping it's a normal likeness. But, that turned out wrong, little did I know it's LOVE,...., that I was about seeing myself swimming majestically in the ocean of love. Seeing myself fell with her is still a mystery. I don't buy the idea of Loving. Loving is not my thing.
When I met her, my whole concept about love changed. The act of loving was better understood with her. Uhn, the love we shared crossed limit, and a U-turn took place, and that set the motion stopped. Why? What changed? It still amaze me how we never talked about it, but, we assumed to be fine, and face our lives, when in true sense, we are both not fine. It’s still an undefined situation — we never broke up, we just seems to be parted.
For I’ve loved her with all my heart? And she broke it into pieces. I’ve loved her, and she threw the love into a dustbin. Her insecurity made the journey more complicated, and worrisome. A major block we had. Her persistent, and consistent nagging fueled the devil’s car. It’s what it is.
Whenever I remember the number of kids we’ve planned on having, I’ll just burst into laughter.
It’a surprising how we chose to play hard to forget the memories, the laughter, and all. Yes, she’s loved me, and I took her love for granted. And this generated a dividing spark between us. We are both right, and wrong. I see how we both struggle to let go, but we can’t just. I could see how the two hearts struggle to let go, but it seems they are still much in love with each other. I see how hard we are trying to delete the memories, but we just can’t, it’s really hard.
Yes, I see how hurt we both are, but the love that binded us together never died...it still in revival state - sighs. I see how shattered our heart and soul are, but yet, they never seems to forget each other. I see how hard they always try to communicate to each other, but the chance never came. They are both shattered,. and broken!
Yes, I’ve seen how we’ve been placed together in different capacities, and how well we’ve connected. I see how proud she’s to have me, and how proud I was to have her. I see how perfect we’ve been tagged “LOVE BIRDS", who could have thought it wouldn’t last. Yes, I’ve seen all! And, it’s a great feeling, and moment.
Yes. Nothing lasts forever, but I wish we last a lifetime. Ihope we find peace and solace wherever we are. And I wish us both the very good best of luck in our endeavours. I dearly miss her. Stay safe.
Well, it's always been said "MAN PROPOSES, GOD DISPOSES" - that'd be my parting words.
© Babatunde Olabode (GMNSE)
17th of August, '24.
